What Does it Mean to be 30 and Single?

What does it mean to be 30 and single?

Most of friends and I are 30 and single.  What do we call ourselves?  Single ladies like Beyoncés song, “Single Ladies”? Are we Destiny”s Child without a Destiny? Maybe housewives of Pittsburgh, with a child and without the wife part.  We could even consider ourselves being the main star of the Bachelorette show, but instead there’s no commitment at the end. Yes, I tried out for the show, but was not chosen.  

My friends and I are regulars at speed dating and haven’t got the dating part down yet, we only succeed at speed meeting.  Perhaps, the host feels bad for us.  Is it sad he knows my sons basketball schedule and my gramma and granpas name?  

30 and single!

What do other people see when they look at our group of 30-year-old single ladies?  In real life, when is the last time we went after a cute guy we spotted at Starbucks?  Probably never.  One time, I was about to make a move after my work shift in the North Side of Pittsburgh.  Then, realized I was an embarrassing human who spilt a PSL all over my light grey blouse and had a chocolate face from the instant urge to purchase and eat 5 melting chocolate chip cookies.  

Why are a group of girls like us still single and 30?  

Do we occupy ourselves with Hallmark and Lifetime specials so much that our list of expectations for a man extend further than a football field? I can say, this is not true at all, I cannot even name three shows from the Lifetime or Hallmark network.  However, I can name at least fifteen Disney shows and ten Nickelodeon cartoons.

Has the single status, doing things independently, going places alone, and calling our girlfriends become such a pattern that we know no different?  Possibly and possibly not.  We live by a routine such as going to yoga, getting manicures, and taking our kids to soccer practice.  30 and single.  Are we stuck in a solo or single mom and child pattern?

What could be the reason behind the single ladies at 30, ongoing lifestyle?  Does anyone have the answers?  Is being single meant for some and not meant for others?  Have we tried online dating?  Yes!  My failed attempts to date online have nothing to do with my personal particular choices of wanting a guy with blonde hair, white teeth, and one who wears blue sneakers.  Why the blue sneakers?  Who knows.

What about networking?  Believe me, we’ve been to almost every event in the city and strive to meet new people.  We may score a first date.  However, second, third, and ninety ninth dates never happen.  Will we ever find the one?  What are the steps?  Can we throw a love spell on someone we find attractive?  These questions remain up in the air. 

Is dating like finding a job?  

In my opinion, these two goals are very comparable.  For example, you may search online and network for prospects.  Then, you may express an interest through an application.  The result, maybe one or two companies call for an interview.  Similarly, one or two matches request a date.  Of course, all your prospects and matches end up the same way, one party decides against moving forward.  In other words, these matches do not work out.  Finally, the result is, no commitment.
How many others are single and 30?  Is this common?  Will we ever find the pot of gold?

Love always,

Christina